Thank you for allowing me to share my story with you and introduce myself to the Holistic Bliss Community. It is a story of returning to love and I hope that somehow it helps you to reawaken love in a more profound way into your life as well. I am now a teacher of love and a healer that utilises my connection to the most powerful love there is to enable healing and transformation of mind, body and soul for my beautiful clients. However, my life was not always this way and in fact was quite the opposite for a long time.
Laying paralysed in fear at night, was my normal, from as early as I can remember. I was a gifted child, and I could feel and know things that others couldn’t. The minute that the lights were turned off when it was bedtime, I was innately aware that something was there in the dark with me. My parents through no fault of their own did not understand what I was experiencing and neither did I at the time. The truth was that I could sense the presence of spirit and I just knew that something was really there. There was actually nothing to fear as it was simply angels, spirit guides and passed loved ones but I was too young to understand this. I had heard too many stories about the boogie man. I endured this fear even into my adult life and even when I had my own children, I would leave a hall light on at night.
I also would see with my physical eyes, two very small beings who would tumble about and dance around me. I feel that they were guides and some kind of elemental beings but different to fairies. However, this was to end abruptly around the age of four, when I realised that I was the only one who could see them and that this was not normal. Subconsciously, I began to shut down or ignore most of my abilities from then on and whenever I had a knowing about something that proved to be true, I would put it down to coincidence and denied my own truth.
I was very sick from the age of 18 months with severe breathing difficulties and would have chronic asthma for a lot of my life. So, very much of my childhood was spent in hospital or unwell enough to play with friends. Many times, I was close to dying. My mother had left my dad to move in with my step-father and this was the beginning of the abuse that I endured as a sensitive child. My dad is a beautiful man which due to circumstances, I rarely saw as a child. My step-father was convinced that I was faking the asthma and would hide my medication from me. For whatever reason, my mother allowed this. I remember at times begging to be taken to hospital and my step-father would become angry and complain that I was keeping him up late. One particular time, when I had been very close to dying, I overheard the doctors berating my mother and step-father for not bringing me in earlier and threatened to call the police for neglect. When I was well enough to go home, I got a lecture from my step-father about not looking after myself better. I was only eight. I have memories of being in the back seat of the car alone on my many journeys to hospital, struggling for every breath and going past a cemetery. I always silently sent love to those who were buried at the cemetery and wondered if this would be the trip when I would be joining them.
My step-father regularly emotionally abused me and my self-esteem plummeted. I now know that he was a narcissist, which was a pattern that I would continue with, as many of us do, until I relearned to love myself. I married a very similar man to my step-father and had three beautiful children with him before separating from him. Very soon after I became involved with another man, who at first seemed to be everything that I thought I deserved, but very quickly saw those familiar traits begin to surface. I had two more beautiful children and stayed for twenty years. I naively believed that I could heal him and get him to see what was so obvious to me. That love was important and that it was possible to have relationships and families that were happy, peaceful and harmonious. I was regularly mocked about my beliefs around love, kindness and compassion and was told that I lived in a fantasy land for believing that. I questioned myself a lot, as I seemed to be the only one who thought like this. Was he right, was I delusional? Did I need to toughen up as he would tell me?
Then finally my inner knowing began to return and I began to become stronger. I started to follow my inner knowing and I found the beautiful Louise Hay’s work and how wonderful it felt to read her words of love. She was right and I was right after all, love is the answer and the way. I loved her work so much that I became a teacher of her work. Then one day, I was to complete my training in another spiritual modality and my partner at the time threatened to kill himself if I left the house. He sensed that I was becoming stronger and his behaviour was simply a ploy to keep me enslaved to his needs. I went anyway and no he did not follow through with his threat. We are no longer together. Over time and with a lot of spiritual study and training, my abilities returned and grew beyond what I thought was possible for me. When I realised I am an empath, that made so much sense as I have always been able to feel emotions of others as if they were mine but did not understand this back then, however, I now do this in a healthier way without physically taking on others issues in order to help them. I also realised that I was a natural channeler of spiritual wisdom and information and had always done this whenever a friend was struggling in life. Information that helped would just come through as if it were my own words.
Connecting to those who have passed as a psychic medium was totally unexpected but it is an amazing gift to have as it brings so much closure and healing. I am humbled to be entrusted with these gifts and I feel a responsibility to share them in order to help create healing, peace and love in the world.
Today, whilst forever a student of the universe and always learning and growing, I am so very blessed to be in a place of self-love and deep connection with spirit. I am immensely grateful for all that I have experienced and to all of the people who have led me to where I am at today. Allowing myself to feel, release and heal all of the emotions that I had pushed down and learning the truth through loving myself has been the catalyst for change in my life. When I say the truth, what I mean is the truth through the eyes of love and not the hurtful words and actions of others that I once believed to be the truth. Learning to truly love myself set me free from my past, and that doesn’t mean in an arrogant way, but in the way that you would love a beloved pet or a small child, unconditionally, even if they make mistakes. To know deep in my heart that I am a beautiful soul of the light and deserve the best that life has to offer and there is no need to prove my worth. I am worthy of all of the blessings of the universe, I am worthy of magic and miracles, I am worthy of the highest love just because I am me and so do you beautiful soul.
I am very honoured now to be able to share all of the love with others, that I have found to be real and true by being a teacher of love and a healer of hearts, minds, bodies and souls.
A big hug from my heart to yours! Jules.
Visit Jules on social media at: https://www.facebook.com/Hearttoheartzhealing
Jules offers a range of modalities including: Theta healing, Egyptian Emotional Clearing Technique, and Louise Hay, Heal Your Life Methods. Call for an appointment: Ph: 0431 529 172
Such a beautiful journey of transformation, love and acceptance. Thank you so much for sharing your story.