Self-Discovery: Self-Confidence is the Fire of Life by LK Tommi

“The only thing that matters in life is your opinion about yourself.” – OSHO

Self-discovery is one of my favourite topics of all time. I love exploring this topic, particularly with teenagers. Because, right now, they are at a pivotal moment in their life. They’re on edge of new, exciting, and thrilling things, everything is fresh and open, and there is so much to do, see, and learn! Being a teenager means they’ve left childhood behind, and they’re entirely facing forward to life as an adult. There are many self-doubts at this stage of a teenager’s life, and I mean many things. They’ve moved out of childhood, and they’re trying to figure out what that means, who they are, or what job they will do, and there are many other decisions they need to make. They are starting to learn that they are on a journey of self-discovery, and sometimes it is exhilarating, and other times it can be fraught with a lot of anxiety and uncertainty.

The journey of discovering who you are is essential in helping them solve any life challenges as they come along and what their future will look, sound and feel like. Our lives are made up of many tiny pictures, but there is also a mighty big picture to discover. To develop all the skills, we’ve discussed in the past few articles, such as changing perspectives, understanding experiences and building resilience, you need to first and foremost understand how you fit into the picture.

Life is like creating a movie; of course, we are the number one character, and then there are the other characters in the movie (our family, our friends, and people we meet along the way). Then there is the setting of where the movie takes place, and of course, in our lifetime, there will be multiple settings, home, school, work, recreational activities, and the beach; I am sure you get the idea and the picture. Finally, people’s experiences in the movie lead to self-discovery, which might be discovering something about themselves, whether it is falling in love, being courageous, fighting for a good cause, or standing up for what they believe.

I instilled in my children the aim of being the best person they can be in this lifetime. For whatever reason, we are here, and it is now up to us to make the most of it and create a life and a self that can move through life in a productive, unique, curious and creative way. We are constantly evolving, just like life, where we are moving, changing, growing, and creating.

The journey of self-discovery and building your self-confidence is an exciting road, sometimes long, sometimes windy, and sometimes straight. In the past article on experiences, we have learnt that we are a combination of our experiences and the people surrounding us. Some things are very positive, but some things may be harmful and will pull you away from succeeding on your journey. And as a teenager, you’re trying to fit in and belong and discover who you are.

Using the discovering you diagram from above, write down each word on a piece of paper, then take some time to research the words and think about what role each of these terms plays in your own life. For example, under self-care, think about what self-care means to you. What are you doing in your life to promote self-care? What does the word inner-critic mean to you? Do you listen to your inner critic? Do you take time to spend with your inner self? If so, what does connecting with your inner self look, sound and feel like? Inner Action, what does this mean to you? How do you motivate yourself to do life? Inner-strength. How do you tap into your inner strength? Are there words there that you have never explored before? If so, would you like to explore them further and see what direction they take you in life?

I am passionate about working with young people to discover who they are at this exciting part of their lives. That is why I have written a book called The Ultimate Teenage
Experience: The Power of Perspective.

It will be published around August to September time. I wished someone had handed me a book in my teenage years; I probably could have used some guidance along the way to save me from falling into the Resilience Pit that we learnt about in the last article too many times. You can now register your interest to be notified of when the book will be released; here is the link:

I love talking about all things self-discovery. Please reach out and have a chat either through

Facebook and Instagram: The Resilience Tutor

LK Tommi

LK Tommi helps children and families to cope with negative life experiences by teaching resilience skills.

Add comment


Join our e-newsletter and hear about our latest news and insights.

* indicates required


Click on the Cover to Read About Dr Judith Orloff

Welcome Barbara Brewster!

Dom LivKamal’s Medicine Room

Download our FREE Holistic Bliss App!

Pitch, Write and Be Seen by Vanessa Finnigan!

Vanessa Finnigan, founder, being interviewed in Europe

Follow us

Don't be shy, get in touch. We love meeting interesting people and making new friends.

Most popular

Most discussed