Sarah King“It’s so much easier to be single.”
My client warns to me, as if the weight of the words were fatiguing her.
The ease of singledom.
The ease of not having to discuss what to have for dinner. What to watch on Netflix. Where to go on your next holiday. What to get Aunty Jane for Christmas.
Financial decisions
Changing careers
Relocating cities
All the big and little things we enter into discussions and conversations and negations about as a couple.
It can seem easier to be single… Sure… Just go to bed whenever you want… maybe it is 7.30pm and no one is there to point it out!
In the world we live in where it takes so much energy to be in a relationship, and even more energy while you are dating…
I am so curious why we allow the ease settle in. Take root.
When, in other areas of our life we shout from the rafters that discomfort is where the growth is. (My own year of 2025 has had the motto of ‘F*ck the comfort zone’) but here in love, romance, dating, relationship we shun the discomfort.
We turn away from the growth, the vulnerability, the self-awareness, the need to be flexible- closing off from being seen, from showing up authentically, from allowing the experience of having a human mirror our inner wounds and deepest fears… taking away the magnification self development that understanding what is agitating you about that person leaving their dirty dishes in the lounge is pushing on your own needs to be valued.
Yes, it is easier to be single.
For now.
What if the next deeper learning in your life is to transmute the fear, the frustration, the discomfort, the hard of dating or relationships into ease.
What if you could express yourself, your desires, your needs, your boundaries, your standards so clearly, so confidently, so empowered that from one conversation, the other could have a clear and concise understanding of how to co-create the ease that you have embraced in singledom. Working with you to create this same ease in partnership.
This is what my client was blocking.
She had written a story that being in love or anything to do with it was hard work. She didn’t have the energy for it. And yet she had come to coaching. She knew that following the intuitive nudge would allow her to come into an awareness that coaching can highlight.
I’m always curious when our ego has us wrapped up in a spin of BS, closed off in fear to keep us safe, and our soul is calling us forward for new experiences, new learnings, new growth.
Will every encounter be easy? No absolutely not. But every encounter will be an opportunity to move closer to the creation of love and life that is desired.
An opportunity to be activated and reach deeper levels than you can as an individual.
An opportunity to turn “hard work” into deep inner work that will serve you a lifetime of personal growth. The choice is ours.
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Christine Sanson Maudy
Ann Moir-Bussy
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