Wisdom for Elders – A lesson from the Spider Trickster by Ann Moir-Bussy

As we grow older, many of us try to learn more or gain more wisdom, and when we talk about getting in touch with our inner wisdom, it seems to begin with us gaining this from the outside first. We read, we study, we listen to podcasts and so on, but until we transform this knowledge through inner reflection and pondering in stillness, it is of no use to anyone else.

When we reach menopause and old beliefs or patterns don’t work for us anymore, we often don’t know which way to turn, and we struggle to let go of the old ways of doing things or the old patterns we have learned. In previous columns, we have shared many myths and fairy tales that we must connect with the wise woman within, for she holds the key to real wisdom.

I was fascinated by a folk tale I came across recently from Ghana in West Africa. There are numerous folk tales here, and many of them came to be called “Spider Tales”, because the stories which men told were stories of Nyankupon, the chief of the gods. Spider, whose name was Anansi, was very conceited and wanted the stories to be told about him. After completing three seemingly impossible tasks, Spider was given permission for the future to call all tales Anansi tales. Here is one of them.

Anansi the Spider Trickster

The Sky God, Nyame, contained all the world’s wisdom in a single pot and decided to share this gift with the world. He gave the pot to Anansi the spider, with the instructions that he was now to distribute this pot of wisdom among all people. Anansi, however, being conceited, didn’t want to share – he thought he could become the wisest creature alive. So, he tied the pot of wisdom to his belly and decided to climb the highest tree where no one could reach it.

Of course, as he climbed, the pot began to sway from side to side and banged against his knees, making it too difficult to climb.

His son was sitting under the tree and suggested that he tie it to his back and then climb more easily. Anansi became angry as his son had outsmarted him. He lost his temper, pulled the pot off, and threw it to the ground, shattering it, and tiny bits of wisdom flew all over the forest and around the world. And Anansi learned that hoarding wisdom and knowledge only left him with an empty pot.

As he wandered sadly through the forest, he realised his pride and greed had led him to throw away everything he had sought to own. He heard a wise owl say:

“Wisdom is not something that can be possessed by one individual, but rather is something that can be shared and grown through our collective efforts.”

Elder Wisdom

When working with women who are moving or have moved through menopause, I often hear them say, “But I haven’t got any wisdom, I don’t have anything to share”. Have you ever thought that about yourself? I certainly did. It’s so easy to deny the gifts and experience that we have learned over the years. Denying our wisdom is like Spider wanting to hoard it. Wisdom is not for hoarding – it is for sharing.

Denying our wisdom is letting our ego obstruct it – letting ourselves be motivated by fear or what others might think. Growth means we need to let go of this fear, take the time to tap into that inner voice, and be humble enough to share our insights. Wisdom grows in relationships.

We don’t own wisdom – it must be embodied. And it must be shared.

Reflection

Take a moment to sit quietly and close your eyes, breathing deeply. Imagine Anansi carrying the heavy pot of wisdom and ask yourself where in your life are you “hoarding” – maybe knowledge, wisdom, or love?

See the pot cracking open and streams of golden light flowing out and passing through you into the world. Breathe this shared wisdom – so much of which you received from others too.

Let your wisdom FLOW.