Some years ago, I went overseas to be there for someone dear to me.
They had struggled with alcoholism for about 35 years, and it had gotten to the point where I called them at 11am in the morning, and they were still so drunk that they could not remember talking the previous day. And that was a common thing that happened throughout the year.
My sense of alcohol abuse is it’s about sadness; alcohol kills an enormous sadness in them, by killing their body…and they can ‘check out’ from this reality because it is unbearable. And it doesn’t have to be struggling to have a place to live or paying bills, it can be about not being who they really are, or they can’t see their way to be fully themselves, and they have to hide who they are or make themselves wrong for wanting something different than everybody else chooses in this reality. Sometimes their anger grows and, one too many drinks can lead to aggression.
An interesting point of view about alcohol:
‘What is alcohol? Alcohol is a lover. It’s a product of nature, therefore it’s spirituality, a natural equalizer. It gives people what they need. Sad gets glad, foolish gets smart, quiet gets loud, shy gets outgoing, ugly turns beautiful, old gets young again, slow gets fast, rushing gets slow. In short, “alcohol relieves all accumulated problems for a minute, giving relief to the drinker and an opportunity to go forward in a judicious way.” (L.Viilma “A Teaching of Survival” p. 240).
I was excessively concerned about this person; you know how your heart breaks when someone important to you is destroying themselves under your own eyes. Until I decided to go over there with no tools other than a big question mark in me: What can I do? What can I be to change that!?!
I was in intense question for a long time or, you could say I was in prayer …
What if sometimes that is all you have to be? The space, the allowance, love. What if that is all that is required?
I left after 3 months. They got remarkably better. They didn’t become a total non-drinker; they can control the amount they drink now. That is even better, as going from one extreme to another (cold turkey) is sometimes a slippery way, although it very much depends on the personality, and what suits them best.
There wasn’t much to ‘do’, it was more about being.
So, what if your body is healing?
What is the miracle that your body is that if you acknowledged it, would create much more for you and for so many others?
Connect with Reena at: www.walkwithme.website