Embracing Your Changing Body

By Kaz Waters, The Mindset Medic

There’s a particular morning I remember very clearly. I was forty-nine, standing in the bathroom, staring at my own face, and thinking: “Oh, come on. We had this sorted.”

For eight years, my skin had been the thing I was quietly smug about. Genuinely radiant. I’d even stopped wearing makeup. And then, somewhere in the final stretch of my forties, hormones threw a tantrum and took my skin along for the ride. Dullness. Dryness. Texture that had absolutely not been invited. Meanwhile, my left shoulder had its own agenda. Restriction and pain that almost a year of physiotherapy couldn’t shift. I’ll be honest with you, I sulked. There were profanities. There was frustration directed at a body I felt was suddenly not keeping its end of the deal.

And this is exactly what I’m exploring in Chapter 6 of Stress-Free Perimenopause with EFT Tapping (working title, I’m going to need your help!) , because I know I’m not alone in that bathroom.

When the body starts changing in perimenopause, whether that’s weight that seems to redistribute overnight, skin that loses its bounce, or joints that suddenly have opinions, our first instinct is often to fight it. To push harder, restrict more, or just white-knuckle our way through it. I’d spent years as a personal trainer and athlete. I was supposed to be able to handle this. The voice in my head was relentless: why can’t you just fix it?

But here’s the thing I finally had to sit with: the rage wasn’t helping. Every moment I spent at war with my body added more stress to a system that was already stretched. I wasn’t supporting it. I was standing in the way of its healing.

The shift that changed everything was surprisingly simple. I stopped asking “why is my body doing this to me?” and started asking “hey body, what do you need today?” That’s not wellness fluff. That’s a genuine nervous system intervention. Because when we’re in a state of stress and self-criticism, the brain reads threat. The amygdala stays activated. And healing, real healing, doesn’t happen in threat mode.

This is where EFT earns its place. Tapping while acknowledging what you’re genuinely feeling, not bypassing it, not pretending it’s fine, but actually meeting it, signals to the nervous system that it’s safe to soften. Research backs this up: EFT has been shown to reduce cortisol levels and decrease the intensity of negative emotions. Over time, those harsh, critical loops lose their grip.

Here’s a short script to try when you’re struggling with what you see in the mirror.

Set-Up Statement:

(Tap the side of your hand and repeat three times)

“Even though I’m frustrated with how my body is changing, I am open to accepting myself.”

“Even though I’m frustrated with how my body is changing, I am choosing kindness for myself.”

“Even though I’m frustrated with how my body is changing, I am listen and learn from it”

Tapping Sequence:

Eyebrow: My body doesn’t feel like my own right now.

Side of eye: These changes are hard to accept.

Under eye: I feel sad for what I’ve lost, and that’s okay.

Under nose: But maybe my body isn’t against me.

Chin: Maybe it’s just trying to adapt.

Collarbone: I’ve been through so much, and my body has always been there.

Underarm: I choose to love my body for all it’s carried me through.

Top of head: I welcome these changes with compassion and curiosity.

Take a breath. Notice how you feel. Rinse and repeat whenever you need it, which might be every morning, and that’s completely fine.

What I know from working with women going through this, and from living it myself, is that the turning point is never about loving your body perfectly. It’s about being willing to stop declaring war on it. That’s the place you start from. And from there, something shifts. The inner chatter softens. You start noticing what your body actually needs instead of punishing it for what it isn’t.

My shoulder, by the way? It’s better. Not because I yelled at it harder. Because I finally got curious about what it was trying to tell me, did the physio, did the EFT, learnt myofascial release therapy to treat myself (that is now another little biz I run, it’s funny where life can take you) and stopped treating it as a personal insult.

I’d love to hear from you what I should call this book, you can email them through to hello@kazwaters.com.au… Chapter 6 goes much deeper into body acceptance, the science behind self-compassion and EFT, and how to rewrite the story you’re telling yourself about ageing. If any of this landed for you, there’s a lot more where that came from.

www.kazwaters.com.au for more free resources and options to book your very own EFT session with Kaz!