Do you make everyone happy but yourself?
Are you choosing for your parents…still, after a few decades on this planet? Really?
That question just came up when I was watching a famous drama series, ‘The Bachelor’. I do enjoy the romantic part, not the drama. I have noticed it happens a lot in these TV shows; ‘My dream woman or a man is somebody that fits well with my family and friends’ is usually the first thing they say.
Where is he or she in this equation?
How many choices have you made for your parents or friends or for a community perhaps?
Which one is lighter, choosing for you or choosing for others; leaving you out of the equation?
That is one reason why ‘bad’ parents are ‘good’ parents; you do not want to copy them. You are much more likely to find your own way, whereas, having your parents as an ideal; you might search your whole life for something that is not actually for you, because every human being has their own unique way to live their life. Only you know what or who contributes to your life, to get to a greater you.
Anyway, it is weird; it’s like a century ago when parents chose a partner for their child, but these days some are still doing it voluntarily, and then wonder why it didn’t work out.
In their final hours they will be thinking; did I live life true to myself? I sure made my parents happy and friends and colleagues and …? What would’ve life had been like if I had chosen for me? Perhaps ask it right now. Change is possible by making incremental new choices.
Are you creating your life or choosing for something for someone else?
Also, choosing for you does not mean choosing against anyone or anything.
What if you ask:
Is this me when I am choosing this, or is it for somebody or for something else?
What if you ask this question with everything in your life? With career, money, friends? Am I choosing for me here or for somebody else?
Sometimes you do not understand why you choose what you choose. So you might like to ask, “is it for now or is it for the future?”
Is this your life and living if you leave yourself out of the equation? Is this kind to you?
Can you contribute to anyone else? If you cannot, be you…There is no resistance. You know.🌹
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